Do I Really Miss You?

No.

Now that you know the answer, let's dive into the article.

"I miss you!"

You might hear it from multiple people and in multiple contexts. I don't really emote very well on texts, yet, I might just say these words. Well, in here I'll dive into the meaning that I put into these three words.

The feeling of missing is the price we pay for loving somebody and being loved back. You don't really miss somebody who doesn't love you back, do you? You miss the people who you love dearly and around who you feel the same love.

People miss other people all the time and it can occur at any time, can be triggered by anything. A few days back, I put on a white shirt which I got in Dehradun when I was visiting a friend's house. Putting on that shirt instantly flooded my brain with all those memories with her--- the music, her friends, the place, the warmth, everything; you can put it this way- I was reminded of a small part of me which I left back in Dehradun.

Crows perched on bamboo

In another very silly instance, I saw a few crows perched on bamboos, and got excited; having nobody to get excited with me made me miss a friend who would've loved to see such a scene. Funny enough, I never found this behaviour of birds to be very interesting, the happiness that my friend derived from such a simple thing was contagious. And here I am missing her while looking at crows. It almost felt like a part of me was missing.

Or the trigger could be extremely normal; like the time when I missed a friend just as I was hogging food!

In other few instances, I felt so sad when I was missing my friends-- there was nothing that I could do to help the situation, for they are no more. To this event, I can point and say that since then, I am practicing not being sad when I miss somebody. Weird, right? Well, I am weird enough to practice such things.

Honestly, I'm never really sad when I miss somebody. I'm happy that I miss them, for then I know that they have done something to be worthy of being missed. Whether it is a bond of brotherhood, friendship, parent-child relationship, romantic involvement, or a mentor-student dynamic, the fact that I feel their absence so deeply, reflects on our connection. I know, in whatever relationship that we have had, I loved them with all my heart and felt loved too. It is a reminder that the moments we spent together was something out of the ordinary; something filled with love. Rather than dwelling in the temporary loneliness of separation, I choose bask in the permanent warmth of the relationship.

Missing somebody then becomes a bittersweet reminder of somebody/something that has enriched my life --- that has a permanent space in my heart - a privilege on my part for getting such beautiful people by me.

Today's my birthday, and I miss a lot of my friends. Well, I'm around family, and I'm grateful for it. Yet, somewhere I'd love to have those few friends around me; some aren't here in this state, some aren't here in this continent, and some are no more. On this brumous February morning, these are the people that would have felt like apricity. Taking this opportunity to say to them, "I miss you".

Remember the return gifts that we used to give on our birthdays? Well, to all my friends, thank-you for the present of your presence in my life, this writeup is a small return-gift from my side (although I won't be sending this to most of my friends).